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A thrilling and darkly funny debut novel about the joy and anxiety of adolescence by the acclaimed memoirist and cult writer
Nicholas has plenty of reasons to feel unstable: heโs fifteen, the child of divorced parents, living with his absent dad in the bleak Chicago suburbs, and an outsider at school. Then, one day in geometry class, he forgets how to breathe. The doctor says itโs just panic, but Nicholas suspects that his real problem might not be a psychiatric one: maybe the Greek god Pan is trapped inside his body.
As his paradigm for his own consciousness crumbles, Nicholas and his friends hunt for answers why โ in art, music and literature โ as they reach for a life beyond the confines of where theyโve grown up and whatโs expected of them. Pan takes us inside the human psyche, where we risk discovering that the forces controlling our inner lives could be more alien than we want to let ourselves believe.
โThere is no other writer like himโ MAGGIE NELSON
โI steal language and ideas from Michael Cluneโ BEN LERNER
'I didn't want the book to end' BLAKE BUTLER
ยฉ Michael Clune 2025 (P) Penguin Audio 2025